My rating: 3 of 5 stars
Hola, everyone! Long time no see, I know. College does things to your reading. Mainly it makes it impossible. This time round, I’ll be reviewing a less-than-thrilling instalment of one of my favourite fantasy series in an Honest Movie Trailers style. Link here if you haven’t seen one of those: The Lion King Honest Trailer
In every good series, there comes a time, sooner or later, when you just want to bash the author’s head in with their own book because they feel the need to give the protagonist recovery time through an entire book.
This fall, prepare for one of the most anticipated YA releases, from the author who started some of the internet’s biggest shipping wars (not the marine kind), where the overwhelmingly speshul heroine, assassin and Fae queen Celaena Sardothien sets out on her biggest adventure yet – the training montage.
Watch as Celaena travels to a mysterious land where magical creatures stalk the woods and people can shape shift, in order to get vital information from her aunt Maeve by…
…doing the dishes.
Meet Prince Rowan Whitethorn, a kick-ass warrior with mysterious tattoos and an immortal lifespan with centuries of experience whose sole purpose is to…
Celaena Elentiya Aelin Galathynius. Urgh. So many names.
Consider the eerie similarities to the first book where the country’s most dangerous teenage assassin undergoes a gruelling but boring training session with a hot guy who distrusts her but can’t help being drawn to her pain and becomes her closest emotional confidant as she struggles to overcome her past, all while investigating gruesome murders caused by grotesque monsters that have something to do with the evil King.
Oh wait, it is the first book.
Meanwhile, thrill as you meet the deadly Ironteeth witches who are basically every high school mean girl clique with iron fangs.
Experience the world through the eyes of a new character who is absolutely unnecessary, Manon of the Blackbeak clan, a ferocious killer and captain of the terrifying Thirteen, who spends most of the book…
Prepare to be surprised by the introduction of the wyverns, who have been haunting the last two books with their potential ferocity, but are really revealed to be loyal horses with wings and big teeth.
Really. Abraxos, Manon’s patchwork dragon, likes flowers. Awww.
Exhilarate in plot twists and turns you can see coming from miles away, including the death of a POV character in Game of Thrones style, the inevitable downfall of another POV character and the emotional non-growth of yet another.
The Celaena dictionary of swear words we never hear
Abrupt chapter endings
Information sharing on a very limited basis when the world is about to end
Dreams and screams
Danaerys Targaryen without dragons as Celaena
Captain America as Rowan
A rock as Chaol
Harry Potter as Dorian
Meryl Streep from The Devil Wears Prada as Manon
Toothless from How to Train Your Dragon as Abraxos
Hitler as the King of Adarlan
Mata Hari as Sorscha
James Bond with long hair as Aedion
HAIR OF FIRE: The Training Montage, Part 2.